It starts out with your child being tired and looking a little under the weather. But it’s the holiday season so you chalk it up to the extra activity and some richer foods than normal. Soon though, you realize what’s really happening. What’s happening is your child is sick and tomorrow is Christmas.

While we’d prefer not have to deal with it, the reality is most families face illness during a major holiday at some point in time. Given the right attitude and a good “Plan B,” you can still make holiday memories. Here are a few tips on celebrating through varying degrees of illness:

Short-term Illness

Sarah Williams’ family enjoyed Christmas celebrations with relatives, but they still had a special event on the calendar when two of her children came down with the stomach flu.

“Two days after Christmas we had tickets to a play that my aunt had given them. They were going to be gone the whole day,” she explains.

Instead they stayed home to allow the sick children to recuperate. But rather than mope around the house, Williams planned a special activity: game day. Her three children each picked a favorite game and together they played all three.

“It was fun. It actually forced us to do something we would not have done on a normal day,” Williams says.

While not every family may be able to have a game day with their sick children, the holiday doesn’t have to be a complete bust. Follow your regular traditions, albeit in a more subdued form out of respect for the person who is ill. Include them as much as possible, while giving them space to simply be sick.

Your Plan B could include a second celebration once the child has recovered. Since it’s not the actual holiday, it won’t be exactly the same. So don’t try to make it that way. Find opportunities to make it uniquely special—like the Williams’ game day.

Hospital Stays and More Serious Illness

No one wants to consider a hospital stay during a holiday. But sometimes it can’t be avoided, whether due to an accidental injury or chronic illness. The best resource for coping with a special date on the calendar while in the hospital is the hospital staff. Find out from your child’s doctor or the hospital social worker what activities the hospital plans for the holiday. Then discuss family expectations.

“During the holiday season we work with families on an individual basis to encourage them to continue their traditions, just looking a little different,” says Rose Seelenbinder, a child life specialist at Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia.

Different is an operative word in this case. There’s no getting around the fact that your child or other sick family member won’t be at home for the holiday. Don’t try to ignore it. Instead address hopes kids may have for the holiday.

Seelenbinder urges parents to be appropriately honest with their children. Encourage your child that “different” doesn’t have to be bad. In fact, with some planning on your part, it can be exceptionally memorable. It’s also important not to go overboard to compensate. It may seem like a good idea, but often ends up backfiring during the transition back home. Remember to give yourself space. Holidays can be crazy without a sickness. Trying to take care of chores at home, holiday errands and frequent hospital visits, and you’re primed for a meltdown.

This may mean leaving the holiday preparation to someone else. Your Plan B could include engaging in the activities available through the hospital and keeping the bedside celebration simple. Focusing on the meaning behind the celebration and not the calendar date will help.

Every year, more than 200 children spend the holidays at Arkansas Children’s Hospital. ACH hosts several activities that bring light and joy to these patients while they are away from home. The week before Christmas, every child who is an inpatient has the chance to shop for their families at a free, volunteer-sponsored event. Children can choose from all kinds of items, ranging from mugs to picture frames, as gifts for their parents and siblings. ACH also hosts the “Festival of Stars” each December, and live holiday music performances are broadcast to every patient room. There are festive craft projects, special story times and other activities that bring holiday cheer to the hospital’s hallways, all coordinated by the Child Life Department. Santa even has a special map to ACH. He visits every child on Christmas Day, bringing each a gift and lots of laughter.

When it comes to holiday preparations, accepting that there might come a time for “Plan B” can be a helpful process. Then when you encounter a sickness in your family, you won’t have to waste energy on shifting gears. You’ll be ready to find your own Plan B for adapting your celebration.

Holiday to Go

Create a holiday basket that takes your tradition to the sick room, whether in your house or at a hospital. Include these elements to make the day special:

• A traditional symbol of your family’s holiday (miniature Christmas tree or Menorah)
• A holiday story book, particularly if it’s one you’ve enjoyed together before
• A gift that can be enjoyed in bed, such as a new CD/music download
• If the patient can eat, include one or two of their favorite transportable holiday foods, like a plate of cookies.

Lara Krupicka is a freelance writer who found new ways to enjoy a holiday during a daughter’s bout of bronchitis.